exams are finally over!
*cue massive sigh of relief*

I'm just tired and worn out. Oh, and semi worn out too.
I think i should start studying harder, earlier. Put in sustained effort, then it mightn't be so torturous studying, and i'd do better for exams.




I just thought that was really funny..
weird, but funny nonetheless. Hahaha

Doom is approaching in the very near future, in the form of exam scripts, which i'll potentially fail. Well, i don't have a whole load of confidence in passing the papers, at least.
My standards are seriously lowered in JC. Even with all the slacking in secondary school, i never did this badly. Shannon, you have to raise your standards.
(man, i always talk to myself in the last sentence, or last few sentences. that's weird. i think)

Man, how cool would it be if i could say 'WOO HOO, IRELAND IS GREAT! MAD PROPS FROM DUBLIN!" (or cork or limerick or something) Ireland always has such cool shit, like.. U2, a nice flag, that hot accent, ullian bagpipes, and all that jazz. And of late, the script.
Ok, i'm not turning like super-pro irish.

Ok, so i realised that i was getting just not keeping in touch with the music world, so i went to check up on the Script. They're pretty damn cool. The man who can't be moved is pretty cool. 'cept it's pretty repetitive.. (Sorry!)
Anyway, the lead singer sorta reminded me of that she-man that gave birth a few months ago.. yeah! remember him? I have no idea why i just remembered that face, but that just freaked me out mightily.
Let us now compare the stark similarities between the two, shall we?



(centre) Danny O'Donoghue, of The Script. (The man who sang 'The Man Who Can't Be Moved')

(LOL, The Script's have a song called 'The Man Who Can't Be Moved'. When i googled 'man gives birth', the first result returned was 'The Man Who Gave Birth', from BBC. OMG FUNNNNYYYYYYYYYYY!)


Thomas Beatie, The Man Who Gave Birth.

I'm not mocking him giving birth, i am merely comparing the title similarities, and the similarities in facial features.
Ok, now looking at it, they don't really look that alike anymore..

Um, slán!
LOL.

ok, new, cheerier songs. i need it. i need cheeriness.
Carin, lol the song here comes the sun suddenly reminded me of your blog.
rays of sunshine come to you..
BUT the whole sun 'comes here for me'
OK lame.
ROFLCOPTER.
nevermind.

today was a semi-unproductive day.
I went to the library, and studied math. Then i realised i suck. I suck because i can't understand so much. Oblique Asymptotes, Vertical Asymptotes, Parabolas, Matrices, Vectors... I just wanna bash myself up. Maybe i'll injure myself so much that i won't have to take the promos.
AGRH.

When i got out the library, there was this man who stuck a piece of paper in my face, so i had to oblige. After taking a look at it, I realise it's a leaflet for a church. Why do churches so actively promote the word of god? is it of that much importance? They don't really stand to gain, do they? When people convert to christianity, others make such a huge deal of it, like 'hallelujah, let us celebrate' etc.. I don't really understand.
Maybe science isn't suppossed to go together with god. Maybe it is. Maybe god isn't real. Maybe science isn't reliable. Maybe, i just don't know anymore. I still think god doesn't exist, but that's just me anyway. I know its so much more comforting to know that theres something out there to look forward to after death.. Some sense of euphoria and serenity about the thought of dying, because there's "something better out there". But really, all i think it is, is just darkness. Like.. a closure, a void. and empty space. Matter, Anti-matter. Ying, Yang. Right, Left.

Life, Death.

or, if christians have it, Life, Afterlife. Heaven, Hell..

religion is a bloody confusing thing. i shouldn't think about this now. I have no time. i have no more space to think about these things in my brain.

i.... i... am really stressed out.
i.... will do my shitting best to promote.
i... will get better in math
i... will try to write better econs essays
i... will try and regurgitate whatever formulas i learnt for chem in exams and understand the questions, and apply correct solutions
i... will become a mugger who knows bio terms inside out
i... will write good compo's
i... will try and understand chinese
i... won't have any regrets.
i... will do this for me.

... ok i don't want to end on that note.

I played GH3 at cousin's place today, and MAN, was i PWNING. i had 98% on knights of cydonia, and 96% on the killers' when you were young. it was pretty damn awesome.

new song, it's quite apt, seeing how i've been increasingly feeling just sadder, and just like reclusive and emo the past few days or so. No, it's not 'emotastic' anymore. HEH. (brainchild of mine during O levels, last year.) its sarcasm, really.
this song is just so beautifully sad, or beautiful but sad. ah who gives a shit. they're both.
BoH getting pretty big now..
I remember playing this song on repeat when stuck with the news of the demise of a grandparent. I just wanted to cry, SO badly. I kept putting this song on repeat, cause it's just so wonderfully sad, that it might make it easier to cry. I just wanted to show emotion, i just wanted to feel. But i hardly knew that grandparent anyway, i only saw her for like 20 days my whole life, and for the most part, it was right before her death. It was just so hard to feel... SO SO hard.
Maybe the media really has desensetized us, as a human race on the whole. But really, i felt SO shit. Because when my parents threatened to give my dogs away, i shed buckets of tears. I'm not going to go into acting LAH. for my relative, grandparent, no less, i just.. couldn't. and when i heard the song again today, i just got haunted by that memory. OK. but it really is an awesome song.

The past few days, i've been feeling more and more shite. The buildup.. its godawful. PR, stress, studies, the fear of not promoting.. it's all hitting me like a ten ton truck with real great force. As much as i'd like to try and react, i'm just in shock, in fear, in awe, and i'm shit scared. You know how when little kids get scared, they pee? Just stone and pee. I feel exactly like that now. I wish i was more carefree. Shannon, don't put up fronts. But seriously, sometimes i really enjoy the times with my mates, but sometimes, i feel as though i'm putting on a chirpy face. Faking a smile, almost. Wait, no. It IS. That's why i constantly draw smiley faces on my worksheets. trashtalking helps a smidge too.. Today, what tasvita wrote on her paper really got me thinking. Well, it's that awesome song by the killers, "Smile like you mean it". It looks so simple, but really its hard. To me, at least, for now. It got me thinking of finding those little joys in life. Like looking at birds singing(i just thought of Viva la Vida there again. YAH, again, then i thought of Hasta La Vista, and now windows vista. shucks lah. ok continuing on with my train of thought,) life shouldn't be all stress, and no fun. Neither should it be all fun and no stress. As i've been saying (but not on my blog, on MSN, i think) what's life without the downs? Downs just make ups feel loads more significant, important, and adds variety and spice to life. Shannon, you better not go down without a fight. Fight, like how we were built. Eliminate flight, FIGHT.
Anyway, i think at the moment, what i really do have to learn, is to smile, like i mean it. Stop putting up airs. Stop faking cheeriness. Be real.
Man, suddenly, i thought of that Camp Rock song. AGRH carin, you've got it into my head now. DANG YOU! Oh, i just realised.. my brain is pretty random. A normal, sane person probably has the connection of neurones in the head ordered and organised. Mine? Its probably all over the place.
Oh, i wish i had synesthesia.
OH THE STRESS. PW, PROMOS, and NOT PROMOTING... (hopefully not)

*edited for its bad english.*
(in my defence, it was 1 in the morning, and i was anally tired.)

ok, jia yi. here it is. :P

past few days sucked. i used to love math, science and language cause i owned at them. but now.. i'm just horrible, so bad, that i just wanna die. I wanna jump off bukit timah cliff and haunt you lah, jia yi. No, i'm kidding lah.

yesterday, we had a class outing (along with A01) at miss law's place. Its... for rich people. While walking past a condo called ridgewood, Steph lamented that it was so named because it was for the rich. haha.

ok, i'm pretty lazy to type some more, from the lack of energy, and pictures speak a thousand words, so here goes.

eeling's expression - priceless.

ants anhialating some chicken bone some person threw on the floor

steph's getting pretty good at the emo faces eh? some mighty large dosages of teen angst right there.

and for some strange reason, i seem to have a picture of literally, an apple iPod in my Pb account. haha, the silly times.

gah, FINALLY i'm done!