it was SO funny. the trailer, i mean. it looks weird though. take it with a pinch of salt.




roflcopter.

btw, nights in rodanthe sucks. don't waste your money. it was so immensely boring and slow moving, that i yawned like 3 trillion times in that movie. Ok, if you have nothing to do with your money, then go watch it.

well, a thousand apologies for not posting any earlier. Not that anyone pretty much cares anymore. Bleh.

The past few days have just been immense. Twas a rollercoaster of emotions, from ups to downs, peaks, then huge dips. Sorta like the CRAAAAZY stock markets of late.

I feel like a PIG. A huge part of this week has been wasted away sleeping. Right after going home, i sleep. Before dinner, i sleep (on occassion) then don't wake up till the next morning. Tis sucky.



But yesterday and wednesday was some good craic. Twas DOPE.

And everyone and anyone that knows me, PLEAE DON'T rub it in that i've not watched HSM3, ok? It's bad enough to see posters, books, advertisements every 20 meters or so. Please, DON'T make it even more unbearable.



On that note, does anyone want to watch these following movies with me?



Madagascar 2
The Curious Case of Benjamin Button
Bottle Shock
High School Musical 3

20 random facts you should know, because i really have nothing else better to do.
1. i say 'shit' in general, more than 50x a day
2. i say shit in a weird way; like "shiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiit"
3. my acoustic guitar's majorly banjaxed.
4. i sleep a lot
5. i play the guitar, and i like it
6. i want to make me a hoodie!
7. i'm bored VERY often
8. i have random outbursts, and i space out a lot.
9. i wish i was a nicer, friendlier, less bitchy, more likable person
10. Mike Rosoft is cool
11. i wish i was a crazily fit person that OWNED at hockey (sadly, i fulfil neither.)
12. i believe in harvey dent as well.
13. i love the number 13. Lucky or unlucky. I say the former.
14. i ramble quite a lot.
15. sometimes i talk just to make sounds.
16. i love my iTunes, though sometimes i do wish my library would expand exponentially, daily, with awesome music, and my harddrive would just be like the universe. expanding in memory size to accomodate the growing music list
17. Macbooks to become cheaper
18. I want to be a musician. But that's pretty impossible, so i'll be a surgeon/doctor/historian/mathematician/economist/accountant(just for the bling and kaching)/philosopher/botanist/dog breeder/wine maker with kickass vineyards/psycologist/product designer/lawyer/Research specialist who maps out the human DNA features and finds cures to seemingly incurable diseases/forensic scientist (though i doubt i could live with seeing so many dead bodies)/graphic designer/producer (in music)/director/ecologist.. and some more. See my difficulty now?
19. i wish i had a summer job as a bartender/barista/bookstore assistant (so i can read the books)/cd store assistant (though given current 'popular' music, i'd probably die of aural infection or something. Damned 50cent, one dollar, lollipop, Jay-Z, and all that crap)
20. i wish i was cool.

i'll post pictures when i get them. Ok.

i'm glad i have parents like mine. They didn't scold me when i told them i failed econs. They said work harder. But they keep comparing to other people, and friends, which kinda demoralises you. But they said that if i had to retain, then that can't be helped. I already studied hard before promos. And they'd rather me "waste" a year now than do A levels next year if i don't think i can do it, and fail it. And it's my decision to make. I'm glad i got stuck with my parents.
They're good people. Most of the time. Unless they yell at me to get off the computer.


Jia Yi pinches her cheeks and says shes fat, or getting fatter.
I pinch my cheecks and think.. "i don't even want to think about it.."

agrh. Everyone around me, and i mean everyone, is skinny. WHY. shannon you glutton.

Today i watched "Eagle Eye" with the parents. I loved all the SFX (NOT SEX) cause it was all so awesome. The ripping and hitting and crashing and dropping everywhere.
Overreliance on technology much?
Way too futuristic
A computer which is smarter than humans?
It looks pretty gross too.
It looks like giant yellow discoball that just came out of the 80s, from some Madonna video or something.
It was a bit too well synched?
But it's only a movie. AND THE SFX. WOW, the SFX. crash BOOM

My maid asked me the other day if i wanted 'friend rice' - then i was like laughing like an idiot, cause she meant fried rice. But then i thought about it. If only i could eat them up and have them with me at all times. And thought that was a pretty cool thought. But then realised that they have no freedom and they'll be digested by HCl in the stomach.
But it's a pretty cool thought to have your friends with u always, no?
ok, not always. ew.
And that's what technology is for. Technology needs some real emotion, not some shit emoticons. I wish videocalls were free.

Shannon. You better study. You don't disappoint your parents again. You better get good grades and make them proud. (And be rich)

life still sucks. I'm trying to find ways to save money and stop giving so much money to the damn PUB. I wish i had solar panels outside my window.. So that i can turn on the AC whenever i want and solar energy will drive power for the computer and AC...... man, technology.........

i'm not sure if i'm being weird here, but jiayi suggested i 'play hard' to be less stressed and all, and don't blame me for being weird here, but this chord progression, really made me smile, and i had to talk about it. it's just really really good! (from 'the blower's daughter' by damien rice)


E Aadd9 Badd11 Aadd9 E
---0----------0----------0-----------0----------0--------
---0----------0----------0-----------0----------0--------
---1----------6----------8-----------6----------1--------
---2----------7----------9-----------7----------2--------
---2----------7----------9-----------7----------2--------
---0----------5----------7-----------5----------0--------

really easy, but sounds damn cool
i think i love the Aadd9 and Badd11 chords. wowzers.

today sucked quite a bit. school, promotionals, life, everything.
but thanks you guys for arranging today. thank you.



thanks rin, for the heart, and lol that u saw me crying in the concourse when u weren't even there.. haha.









my face is SO chubby.

i bent down.
serene.is.high.

Serene:OMG did you watch F1? I've converted so many people!!!
Me: Were u upset about the kimi thing?
Serene: KIMI RAIKONNEN!!!
*everyone turns to look*
Me: Still crazily obsessed over him huh? Your email so gives it away...
Serene: When stupid Alonso overtook during the 7th round i was SO pissed. Bloody pit stop! It was so unfair to Ferrari! Then i turned off the TV.

Also, apparently, my command of the english language has got worse. SHIT.

thanks you guys for arranging today. it made me feel better and special, and i dunno.. that you cared... so thanks...
on another note, serene, yuqi, and everyone else said i look thinner now, so that's good. that made me smile. heh.

and to all those who i've been offloading all my problems to these few days, thank you for listening. really. it means a lot to me that at least someone hears me.

P.S. today i had a lot of people patting my head?! and giving me headwhacks. I miss those headwhacks in secondary school. Stupid, but fun. And a poignant memory of secondary school life.
Serene's headwhacks hurt. A lot. haha.
Wow, i sound like some really violent person. I'm not.
Physical hurt is better than emotional hurt.
And in this case, WAY more fun and silly too.

thanks for today.
the later half of it, at least.

today was both horrible and good at the same time
loads of screw ups. namely in OP and band.

the good:
it's a load off my chest.
joking and messing around with noella is kinda fun, so thanks guys. (:
i remember the start of the year.. i couldn't talk to any of you guys. Seriously.
I was scared of LiLing, and thought Noella was fierce and Sam was ok.

But messing around, listening to sam crap, and eye rolling (sometimes) with noella just makes me laugh. I never knew i would be a convert, and never did i expect myself to be so sentimental (ok a bit) but pw really changes your opinions of people. You go in the group never expecting group dynamics, but in the end you do end up with it. BUT I DONT LIKE PW. TOTALLY BULLSHIT.
In miss chew's words, she was "the suay guinea pig batch to test PW"
Sure, our group isn't the most hardworking, or the most well prepared. And we slack like crazy.
It's really screwed up. But it's not screwed up in the screwed up way, most of the time..

OP. damn you.
and sometimes, friends act like they care out of guilt or anything.
You know what? people always leave.

I don't want to forgive and forget so easily. but for the sake of being a better person, i will attempt to suck up my pride and go on. and forget.

Life still sucks. Sometimes you have a happy stuff, then things and people come along and ruin your happiness.

Am i stupid? Why can i never answer the questions relavently? Why do i always fail? Why am i always so careless? WHY. Why is life so shit?

Thanks jia yi, thanks wei en. (:
P.S. stop acting nice to me. please. (not the two of u mentioned above)

how does it feel like when you're drowning?
I feel as though i'm drowining into an endless pit. One that has no end. Well, sometimes it gets better though. I'm not sure if it's PMS or anything, though i doubt so.
How'd you feel when you're like drowning, and no one gives a shit?
No one cares anymore.
How would you feel when you're just sad, and your friends always pang seh you?
How'd you feel?
How would you feel when you're drowning and no one gives a damn?
How would it feel when they give a damn when someone else is also going through a hard time, and they don't give a shit about you?


Fuck you.
champagne for my real friends, real pain for my sham friends.
(except most of you can't drink at this age and i can't buy alcoholic produce legally.)

Sorry i'm not the cheery me now. Life sucks. This whole economic crisis, everythings getting more expensive and everything is just taking a huge toll on me. Doesn't life depress you?
Man, why can't i practice what i 'preach', i.e. don't be sad in life BLA BLA BLA. Gosh. damn it all.
NO. My parents DID NOT lose their jobs. *touchwood.*

i feel like a horrible person.

i feel horrible too.

theres this nagging feeling inside me, telling me i'm going to have a meltdown soon. I hope not..

Workload is hecka large.

I have no idea what to do anymore..

Sometimes, things others you have to work with or are around just hurt you with their actions. Human interaction, and response confuses me greatly. If ever i feel hurt or whatev, i'll just act all cheery again, and shrug it off. I guess you just build imaginary barriers and boundaries around oneself. I know how a mime feels now. Really.
(BUT I WON'T GO BE A MIME.)

(i just turned on youtube to watch the freehugs video. It just made me cry and smile at the same time. humans are such complex creatures. A little pat on the back, or a little hug all helps.. humans are pretty cool.)
-wow, i sounded like an alien commenting on the human race there.



Sometimes, when you stand back and just observe, do you really see what is happening around you. Diversification is good.



I wish i was a fish, free as could be. The only worries; food, shelter and survival.
Swimming in the ocean, with not a care in the world. When i jump into a swimming pool, i just feel.. free. I feel alive. I feel liberated.



i wish i had a journal.

a real journal.

not livejournal, not microsoft word, a journal.

Oh wait, i have one. Cynthia gave one to me. Gonna go write now.

i suddenly feel almost.. poetic and lyrical.

Yeah right.



Oh nevermind, after i'm done with PW and band work, i'll go learn drums. I borrowed a drumming instructional DVD from the esplanade library. Hehehe.



Shannon, you fucking procrastinator. You should just kill yourself to make the world a better place.



Today there was a talk on abstinence, from sex. What if someone choses to abstain, but never gets married? Anyway, we're all not really virgins now anyway. (maybe primary school kids are) Life screws us all.

Shannon, you self-centred, assholic idiot. Stop your bullshit. You aren't being fair and seeing things from other's prospectives. All you do is whine whine whine. About yourself and your problems and your screw ups. Stop all this negativity. Channel your negative energy into positive energy, and let the positive energy flow to your chakras. (i just laughed at that. Yoga freaks me out a bit.)

I think everyone is self-centered. Fulfilment of one's wants no matter what the cost. Everyone has a basic want to fulfil one's desires. Only then, do they (if they do) care about others. It was proven in a study that if you engaged in conversation with another, they would be most interested and attentive if you were talking about them, or things they liked. I tried it out before just to see if the results were accurate. They were.

Anyway, i'm not being cryptic here, i'm just talking about the human race, as a whole. Not targeted at any one person, so don't go paranoid if you think i'm talking about you. I AM NOT. i am just making a general observation.

Sometimes, little things depress me.
Like how nobody cares about saving the earth. Just take a look in the girl's toilet. When peeing, the amount of tissuepaper they take.. it's wasteful, and it's killing trees. It's not like they need so much anyway. It's like they're taking in oxygen. Take and take and take.
Cutting down of trees, burning down forests, turning on the A/C to such low temperatures.
When showering, take such long showers, and don't turn off the showerhead when soaping.
How many of us can say we have conciously made an effort to save the earth?
Its like nobody gives a shit about the earth anymore.
You can ignore me if you want, i won't go be the environment police or something even if you waste.
No it's not about the bills.
Ok, fine it is A BIT. but the main issue is still environmental conservation and preservation. Do we want all that we contribute to this earth to be just carbon emissions?
Bloody PUB. Inflation has gone up to such a high, and with the financial crisis just around the corner, or here already..
PUB is a natural monopoly. It's suppossed to be regulated by the government to check that it's not fucking it's citizens up. What government checks, what pareto effeciency. You're suppossed to help us out here, now you're just adding on to the burden. YOU'RE A FUCKING NATURAL MONOPOLY FOR CRYING OUT LOUD. You're state checked to make sure you're not going to make supernormal profits by exploiting consumers, and their welfare. I'm sure prices of oil haven't and will not go up by 21%. Oil prices just fell to $94 a barrel. (It was $140+ at it's highest.) Why didn't you raise price then huh? SCAMMERS.
Oh globalisation, economic crisis, you're making the poor poorer, and the rich (some) poorer.
I HAVE NO MONEY. GO AWAY. AGRH.
maybe i'm just venting on PUB, globalisation, and the economic bullshit turmoil. But it's better than venting on people, who have emotions.
"Now is the best time to be a youth"? Your head. The list of things to worry about is infinitely long. Education, Finance, Health, Survival... just to name a few.
When man became more advanced, people became increasingly stressed. This human advancement, globalisation, "we are getting smarter" thing is a double edged sword. One that is being a pain in the ass and stabbing me in my guts.
Bloody hell. Damn you.


P.S. Note to self:
shannon, stop pushing people out when you just don't feel well anymore.
Negativity sucks, but at least it's the truth, i'm not hiding behind a mask.
Stop acting so strong emotionally, and be so extra and accept everything that you have been dealt with.
If the cards you were dealt suck, discard them.
Don't discard friends. Don't push people out. Don't act like you're ok when you're not.
i got through another day. not smiling feels weird, but my heart's just weighed down (not because i went to clog my arteries with fats,aka lipids)
i guess it's a good thing. i just didn't feel like smiling today.
I lie. I bloody lie. A lot. Sometimes it's fun, sometimes it's to hide the truth when you don't want pity or worry from others. And sometimes, it's to hide your real feelings. (NO, if you're reading this, i did not contract no std, or turn like gay or anything of that sort.)
Why are some people so at ease with revealing their feelings, and laying it all out on the table, when others just can't?
Stop nodding your head and accepting tasks when you know you can't handle them.
Stop overloading yourself with so much things to do.
Relax, take a chill pill. (i wish.)

i just thought of The Who's "Behind Blue Eyes" - I feel like that. Except i wish i had blue eyes. That'd be cool.

Today, i was humming "Rootless Tree" by Damien Rice a lot. It sure is emo. But who gives a shit, it's an awesome song. Float on makes me smile. If only i could.. float on.. (not like a ghost or spirit)

i'm sorry PW group.
i am the most HORRIBLE person to get to do microsoft powerpoint.
really.
In secondary school my groupmates laughed at my skill level (or lack of skill level)
Sorry i'm always handing up stuff late, or am just very blur about the project.
Man, i think i'm a difficult person to work with.

PR is annoying.
MSN is annoying
friends get annoying sometimes
life is hectic
life is stressful

LIVESTRONG.

HEADACHE.

immense pain.
die.

Sometimes, life is just NOT fair. I detest how a pretty much useless bum can negotiate and assign tasks to people who have been doing tasks all this while. I hate how i have to do double. I hate how i have to go out of my way to find resources. It's not fair, but then again, life isn't.

These few days are going to be hectic. Design band tee, do up flyers and letters, do pw video, do pw slides.

all in two days.
Crikey.

I hate how i get blamed, and get anger vented on me, for just trying to help. if i don't do anything wrong, don't raise your voice AT me. it pisses me off mightly. The counting to 10 thing helps. A LOT. i hate the promotional exams. i hate life. i hate this education system shit. it's not fair.

I hate my decisions in life
I hate me and my slacking, and doing nothing about it
i hate how i get assigned so much BS
i hate my neck cramps
i hate my headaches
i hate school
i hate pw
i hate china, and all this melamine BS
i want my snickers
i want my chocolate pillows
i want food
i like chicken rice
i like bitching about how sucky pw is
i semi like life again
soon, shannon, the clouds will dissipate, and a rainbow will show through. life WILL get better.
YOU MUST STUDY LAH.
IDIOT. STOP BITCHING ABOUT LIFE.